The Dating Dictionary

ATTRACTION - the act of associating horniness with a particular person.

LOVE AT 1st SIGHT - what occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely
choosy people meet.

DATING - the process of spending enormous amounts of money, time, and energy
to get better acquainted with a person whom you don't especially like in the
present and will learn to like a lot less in the future.

BIRTH CONTROL - avoiding pregnancy through such tactics as swallowing
special pills, inserting a diaphragm, using a condom, and dating repulsive

EASY - a term used to describe a woman who has the sexual morals of a man.

EYE CONTACT - a method utilized by a single woman to communicate to a man
that she is interested in him. Despite being advised to do so, many woman
have difficulty looking a man directly in the eyes, not necessarily due to
the shyness, but usually due to the fact that a woman's eyes are not located
in her chest.

FRIEND - a member of the opposite sex in your acquaintance who has some flaw
which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.

INDIFFERENCE - a woman's feeling towards a man, which is interpreted by the
man as "playing hard to get."

INTERESTING - a word a man uses to describe a woman who lets him do all the

IRRITATING HABIT - what the endearing little qualities that initially
attract people to each other turn into after a few months together.

LAW OF RELATIVITY - how attractive a given person appears to be is directly
proportionate to how unattractive your date is.

NYMPHOMANIAC - a man's term for a woman who wants to have sex more often
than he does.

SOBER - condition in which it is almost impossible to fall in love.

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