Coming Home for Dinner - the 50's and the 90's

The following is from an actual 1950s Home Economics textbook intended
for High School girls, teaching them how to prepare for married life:

1. Have dinner ready: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious
   meal - on time.  This is a way of letting him know that you have been 
   thinking about him, and are concerned about his needs.  Most men are 
   hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of
   the warm welcome needed.

2. Prepare yourself.  Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when
   he arrives.  Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and  be, 
   fresh looking.  He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.  Be a 
   little gay and a little more interesting.  His boring day may need a lift.

3. Clear away clutter.  Make one last trip through the main part of the
   house just before our husband arrives, gathering up schoolbooks, toys,
   paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables.  Your husband will 
   feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a 
   lift too.

4. Prepare the children.  Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands
   and faces if they are small, comb their hair, and if necessary, change 
   their clothes.  They are little treasures, and he would like to see them 
   playing the part.

5. Greet him with a warm smile, and be glad to see him.  Minimize the noise.
   At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of washer, dryer or vacuum.
   Try to encourage the children to be quiet.


1. Don't greet him with problems or complaints.

2. Don't complain if he's late for dinner.  Count this as minor compared
   with what he might have gone through that day.

3. Make him comfortable.  Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or
   suggest he lay down in the bedroom.  Have a cool or warm drink ready 
   for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes.  Speak in 
   a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice.  Allow him to relax and unwind.

4. Listen to him.  You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment
   of his arrival is not the time.  Let him talk first.

5. Make the evening his.  Never complain if he does not take you out to
   dinner or to other places of entertainment; instead try to understand his
   world of strain and pressure and his need to be home and relax.

6. The Goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your
   husband can relax.

The Updated Version for the 90's Woman

1. Have dinner ready.  Make reservations ahead of time.  If your day becomes
   too hectic, just leave him a voice mail message regarding where you'd like
   to eat and at what time.  This lets him know that your day has been crappy
   and gives him an opportunity to change your mood.

2. Prepare yourself.  A quick stop at the "LANCOME" counter on your way
   home will do wonders for your outlook and will keep you from becoming
   irritated every time he opens his mouth.  (Don't forget to use his 
   credit card !)

3. Clear away the clutter.  Call the housekeeper and tell her that any
   miscellaneous items left on the floor by the children can be placed 
   in the Goodwill box in the garage.

4. Prepare the children.  Send the children to their rooms to watch
   television or play Nintendo.  After all, both of them are from his
   previous marriages.

5. Minimize the noise.  If you happen to be home when he arrives, be in the
   bathroom with the door locked.


1. Don't greet him with problems and complaints. Let him speak first, and
   then your complaints will get more attention and remain fresh in his mind
   throughout dinner.

2. Don't complain if he's late for dinner, simply remind him that the
   leftovers are in the fridge and you left the dishes for him to do.

3. Make him comfortable.  Tell him where he can find a blanket if he's cold.
   This will really show you care.

4. Listen to him, but don't ever let him get the last word.

5. Make the evening his. Never complain if he does not take you out to
   dinner or other places of entertainment - go with a friend or go
   shopping (use his credit card). Familiarize him with the phrase 
   "Girls' Night Out!"

6. The Goal: Try to keep things amicable without reminding him that he only
   thinks the world revolves around him. Obviously he's wrong. It revolves
   around you.

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