The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?"
The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?"
The graduate with an Economics degree asks, "How much will it cost?"
The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Would you like fries with that?"


Engineers think that equations approximate the real world.
Scientists think that the real world approximates equations.
Mathematicians are unable to make the connection.

A Mathematician, a Biologist and a Physicist are sitting in a street
cafe watching people going in and coming out of the house on the other
side of the street.

First they see two people going into the house.  Time passes.
After a while they notice three persons coming out of the house.

The Physicist: "The measurement wasn't accurate".
The Biologists conclusion: "They have reproduced".
The Mathematician: "If now exactly 1 person enters the house then it will be
empty again."


Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the
possible designers of the human body.

One said, "It was a mechanical engineer.  Just look at all the joints."

Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer.  The nervous system
has many thousands of electrical connections."

The last said, "Actually it was a civil engineer.  Who else would run a
toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?''


Two engineering students meet on campus one day.  The first engineer
calls out to the other, "Hey -- Nice bike!  Where did you get it?"
"Well," replies the other, "I was walking to class the other day when
this pretty, young coed rides up on this bike.  She jumps off, takes
off all of her clothes, and says 'You can have ANYTHING you want!!'"
"Good choice," says the first, "her clothes wouldn't have fit you


An engineer, a physicist, and a mathematician are shown a pasture with
a herd of sheep, and told to put them inside the smallest possible
amount of fence.

The engineer is first.  He herds the sheep into a circle and then puts
the fence around them, declaring, "A circle will use the least fence for
a given area, so this is the best solution."

The physicist is next.  She creates a circular fence of infinite radius
around the sheep, and then draws the fence tight around the herd,
declaring, "This will give the smallest circular fence around the herd."

The mathematician is last.  After giving the problem a little thought,
he puts a small fence around himself and then declares, "I define
myself to be on the outside!"

In some foreign country a priest, a lawyer and an engineer are about to
be guillotined.

The priest puts his head on the block, they pull the rope and nothing
happens -- he declares that he's been saved by divine intervention --
so he's let go.

The lawyer is put on the block, and again the rope doesn't release the
blade, he claims he can't be executed twice for the same crime and he
is set free too.

They grab the engineer and shove his head into the guillotine, he look=
up at the release mechanism and says, "Wait a minute, I see your