The Last Ten Things Any Woman Would Ever Say

1. Could our relationship be more physical?  I'm tired of just being friends.
2. Go ahead and leave the seat up.  It's easier for me to douche that way anyway.
3. I think hairy butts are really sexy.
4. Hey!  Get a whiff of that one!
5. Let me cook tonight.  I+m tired of going out to dinner.
6. Please don't throw that old T-shirt away.  The holes in the armpits are just too cute.
7. This diamond is way too big!
8. I won't even put my lips on that thing unless I get to swallow.
9. Does this outfit make my butt look too small?
10. I'm wrong.  You must be right again.

 The Last Ten Things Any Man Would Ever Say

1. I think Barry Manilow is one cool motherfucker.
2. While I'm up, can I get you a beer?
3. I think hairy butts are really sexy.
4. Her tits are just too big.
5. Sometimes I just want to be held.
6. That chick on +Murder She Wrote| gives me a woody.
7. Sure!  I'd love to wear a condom.
8. We haven't been to the mall for ages. Let's go shopping, and I can hold your purse.
9. Forget Monday Night Football.  Let's watch Murphy Brown.
10. I think we are lost.  I+d better pull over and ask for directions.