Martian Invasion

A couple of aliens land on Earth.  They waddle over to a gas station and
begin talking to a gas pump.  "Take me to your leader," one tells the pump.
Of course, the pump doesn't answer.  The alien tries again.  "Take me to
your leader."  Still no response.  The alien starts to get mad.  "Didn't you
hear me?  I said take me to your leader!!"  When the pump still gives no
reply, the alien threatens, "If you don't talk to me, I'll shoot you with my
laser gun."  The pump ignores the threat, and so the alien pulls out his
His companion tells him, "Can you hold on while I go around the block?"  The
first alien is confused, but waits until his friend walks down the block.
ZAP!!!  The alien shoots the gas tank and BOOM!!! the whole gas station
explodes.  The alien is thrown back a block, to where his partner is.  He
asks his friend, "If you knew that was going to happen, why didn't you tell me?"
The second alien responds, "Well, I wasn't sure anything was going to
happen, but there was no way I was messing with a guy who can wrap his dick
around himself once, pull it over his shoulder and have enough to tuck over
his ear!"