10. Annual breast exams are conducted at Hooter's 9. The directions to your doctor's office include, "take a left when you enter the trailer park". 8. Tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicle 7. The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from the local Roto-Rooter 6. The only item listed under the Preventive Care feature of coverage is "an apple a day" 5. Your "primary care physician" is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last week. 4. You find out that "Patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges" is not a typo 3. The only expense that is covered 100% is.....embalming. 2. With your last HMO, the Viagra pills didn't come in different colors with little "M"s on them. 1. When you asked for Viagra, they gave you a Popsicle stick and duct tape!
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